NYC YA LATER...

New York City, is there anywhere else like it on the planet? I hope not. One is enough. Where else can $2000 buy you thirty days of residency in a 300 square foot box? Where else can you catch the swine flu from 3 out of 4 neighbors? Where else can you get a $175 dollar ticket for an expired parking meter? Where else can you...? You get the idea.

In reality, NYC's not all bad. For example, my little Chinese laundry lady was quite jovial (despite the fact she spent 20 years behind the same counter, weighing bags of laundry on a scale that I'm certain was at least 15 lbs light, but who was I to say anything?). Our broken English conversations were always a delight, and I could spend the remainder of the day wondering what we were talking about.

Ever see this ad before? It's for a storage company here in New York.


Storkage?? Really? That's just asinine. Who would ever store a dining room table to make room for a crib? Me, that's who. What's even worse is that the idea hadn't occured to me and then I saw this ad at the subway and thought, Eureka!! That's it!! Crisis averted. We just won't eat anymore. Baby has a place to sleep AND we will all lose weight. Maggie will be back to her pre-preggo hot skinny self in no time!

One day you just wake up and think, "WHY!!??" I don't like living here. Why am I living here? I don't like anything about this place (except that Indian restaurant down the block, but that's hardly reason for permanant habitation).


Maybe you should do something about it.


Maybe you should make a list of the things you do like.


Maybe that list looks something like this:



I've got it!! Maybe we should all just move to the Caribbean... Yep, the Caribbean.

But where?? Umm, this island looks pretty neat. What's it called?
St. Croix. Cool name. Let's go there.



And we should probably get Finn a sun hat.